There are few frozen meals as crowd-pleasing, timeless, and varied as frozen pizza. Having one in your freezer for last-minute meals or late-night cravings is always a good idea, but not every frozen pizza is up to par, even for a low-cost, low-effort snack. That’s why Chowhound embarked on a pizza-tasting journey to establish a definitive ranking of store-bought frozen pizza brands so that you can choose the best of the best, and avoid the worst.
Totino’s may be your go-to for those beloved pizza rolls, but their frozen pepperoni pie? We can’t give it as much love. Whether you remember Totino’s Party Pizza from childhood sleepovers or as a snack from broke college days, it’s a freezer aisle staple. But nostalgia alone can’t save this classic from the harsh reality of modern taste tests. In our ranking of 16 store-bought pizzas, Totino’s landed dead last.
So, what exactly makes a great frozen pizza, and where does Totino’s miss the mark? When evaluating frozen pizzas, key factors include a well-balanced crust that isn’t too flimsy or too dense, a sauce that brings the right blend of tangy and savory flavors, a cheese that melts into gooey goodness, and toppings that are generous and well-distributed. The best frozen pizzas manage to check most, if not all, of these boxes. Unfortunately, Totino’s falls short across the board.
Why Totino’s Party Pizza misses the mark
The problems with Totino’s Party Pizza start right at the base: Rather than a satisfying crust, it offers a cracker-thin, flavorless foundation that doesn’t hold up. Then there’s the cheese. Melty, gooey cheese is a cornerstone of great pizza. Totino’s frozen pie didn’t deliver on that front either. Rather than melting together nicely, each strand of cheese seemed to crisp up individually, leading to the opposite of a satisfying cheese pull in each bite. Plus, Chowhound noted that the pepperoni on the pie was pretty scarce, which was disappointing. The sauce was the major offender, tasting less like marinara and more like badly flavored ketchup. Sure, Totino’s isn’t trying to compete with gourmet pies, but even compared to budget-friendly brands, it struggles. But hey, if you’re in it for the kitsch factor or that $2 price tag, maybe it’s worth the gamble.
If you do find yourself with a Totino’s frozen pizza in your freezer, there are always budget-friendly hacks to upgrade even the worst frozen pizzas at home. For example, enhance frozen pizza crust that tastes bland or soggy with a quick brush of melted butter before popping it into the oven. Similarly, sprinkling on extra cheese and fresh toppings can help mask the shortcomings of the original product. A drizzle of hot honey or a few red pepper flakes can also give it a flavor boost. But at the end of the day, there are far better budget-friendly options to choose from — Totino’s simply doesn’t deliver.
